Saturday, December 31, 2011

2012 Goals

Today we totally just took it easy and had a lazy day.  It really doesn't feel like New Years Eve, Mike is actually off but we didn't make any plans.  I still have a hard time leaving Jocelyn.  I would have a hard time anyway, but might find it easier if she didn't have such serious people anxiety (I say people instead of stranger, because she won't go to anyone that's not family.  Even familiar faces).    Dinner is steak & crab, which we still have not actually consumed yet. lol  We are SUCH late eaters, that should probably change.   I made another batch of stock today and spent a lot of my time planning some changes for the new year.  I've never been huge on new years resolutions, I will occasionally set some new year goals, but generally they're the same goals I try to achieve in daily life.  This year the timing just happens to all coincide.

I always have a million back stories before ever getting to point.  This is SUCH  a problem for me because one back story reminds me of another, which reminds of another and then I completely forget my point altogether!  Fortunately I'm writing, which helps me keep track of where the heck I was going with my story.

SO, back on track with my backstory so I can tell you my real story ;) HA!

I have recently been diagnosed with ADHD.  Mike has been telling me for years that I am ADD and I have always suspected that I may be, the whole easily distractable thing....  (Not to mention that my dad is diagnosed ADHD and I suspect my brother is as well.)  I've always managed just fine, but I think being unemployed without a rigid daily schedule, along with my complete focus and attention being on Jocelyn, my brain goes every which way....ALL. THE. TIME.  I did try setting a schedule for myself and it worked fabulously...for about a month.  My point is, I've been driving myself CRAZY.  I can't carry a complete conversation because I get distracted and off track, forgetting what I was saying in the MIDDLE of saying it!!  I kept telling myself, and everyone else, that I had serious preggo brain, then baby brain, which I know is normal, but I'm not sure how long I can use that.  It's seriously disruptive to my daily life as far as getting tasks accomplished.  I think the only place I don't fail is with Jocelyn, and really, it's not like that's optional.  Even when we leave the house to run an errand or attend a playdate, I run back into the house at least 5 times before ever pulling out of the driveway (sometimes after getting down the block) to grab things I've forgotten.  Offending people unintentionally because I get so frazzled and/or hyperfocused. 

OKAY, my reason for sharing all this is:  I've decided I need some serious organization in my life to help me get my brain back.  I already have a planner, that I would be lost without, but I mean organizing the whole house to the extreme.  There will be a place for literally everything.  Labels, tags, bins, baskets, jars, etc.  Purging items that go unused, take up space, or just not my taste and learning not to be sentimental about everything.  Creating a schedule for both Jocelyn & I and sticking to it.  It's time...much overdue actually.  I think maybe having an organized home, and a better structured day, will create an oasis of peace in this life of chaos.  I don't really talk about how chaotic things are because it's a little (a lot) embarrassing (though I'm sure you've noticed in pictures).  I've never been a neat freak, though I prefer things that way.  I feel stressed and can't fully relax if there's junk everywhere, but finding the motivation (then keeping focused) is a challenge for me.  It's a million times harder when you have a monkey for a child, but I need to put a lot more effort into trying.  When the house is in order, I feel more put together and like I can concentrate a little better on the task at hand and anything in general.  I know this is probably true for everybody.  This will be a serious challenge for me and one I desperately need.  I will probably start a blog just for organizing to help motivate me.  Wish me luck!!  I'm gonna need it.

So my top 3 goals for this year are:
2) Get back into aerobics (I've taken a 2 month break and CAN TELL).
3) Find a church home.
Get Jocelyn potty trained.

If you wanna come visit and help me out with any of the above, I won't say no ;) LOL!

Overwhelmed Distractable Momma  (maybe that's what I should change my blog name to)

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